Happy New Week

Turning over New Leaves

quentin blake<3

Could this be the most wonderful QB painting i’ve ever seen? can you smell the crisp air, feel the wonder of the little mole gazing into the sky through the windswept trees, thinking about how it’s a new day, a new year, a new life?

Anyway the first week of the year has been a little bit of that, and a little bit of this

QB again

and this

Some beginning-of-year things i’ve done to ward off the void, as it were:

1. Deleted instagram off of my phone (i still check it daily on my laptop/ipad but now it doesn’t haunt my every moment)

2. Drew a daily cartoon.

   

   fact: i was not aware of the “pondering the orb” meme until after I drew this, i was just thinking about how even if I had a magical object that could tell the future exactly as it would happen, i’d still doomscroll it

   I drew this the day that Los Angeles was devastated by fires. I never know what to say. Here is a mutual aid link to help a few of the MANY artists and animators who lost their homes and were displaced. Here is a link to Los Angeles Mutual Aid Network’s spreadsheet of resources.

3. With all of my free mental and emotional space, I read three books in two weeks (ME??? YES, ME!): The Underground Railroad, Middlesex, and Stay True (a re-read). I chose the first 2 books at random off of a $1 shelf in a thrift store and incidentally all of these books won Pulitzers, haha.
   

   
   I went to a used book store and bought a pile of books I want to get through in relatively short order, and combined it with some old classics that I bought literally while I was in law school and have never read.

   

   I’m trying to read more widely (ie: not JUST contemporary memoir written by people around my age) in an effort to expand where my brain goes when I try to do creative things. I plan to share what I’m reading here, but I DON’T think I’ll make a habit of writing “reviews” unless I feel particularly strongly about something - I don’t find it helpful or natural to summarize my opinion on a book immediately after having read it, and prefer to let it percolate over time.
   
   More than anything, i’m just floored that my brain is able to do this at all instead of falling asleep immediately - a combination of ADHD medication plus not being pulled into a phone every 6 minutes, maybe!
   
   (NOTE: This isn’t some kind of show-offy, book-reading-is-more-moral-than-instagram contest — I recognize that sometimes you just need to be on instagram a lot, and sometimes you need to be doing other stuff. The truth is i’ve been doomscrolling instagram for the past 10 years and suddenly I feel strongly that to move forward as a human being I need to be doing other stuff, including this.)
   

4. I’m officially training for a marathon, which means i’m just continuing to run three times a week, in progressively longer weekly distances, doing physio exercises while watching Star Trek, and hoping for the best. I am using a free training plan from Hal Higdon’s app and it’s been great!

   

   I AM FREE OF THOUGHT AND EXPECTATION

   I know I will sit endlessly at my desk if the only goals I have this year are career-oriented, so marathon training is to force some separation between my work and personal life. And to help take my mind off of ~it all~ once in a while.
   

5. I’m revamping my long-ignored Notion in an effort to organize all of the things that need to be done this year. I also plan to do a website refresh at some point….. TBD about that.

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Since it’s a new year, I am once again thinking about the role of this Substack in my life / to the world. I am feeling an encroaching obligation to put “insightful” writing and art “on the record” out of desperation to “help” in some way, given… everything.

no one does it like Barry Blitt i tell ya

I’m also recognizing that when I feel this desperation creeping up, it’s usually a sign to stop and reassess why i’m doing this in the first place. Trying to make stuff in the service of filling some perceived moral vacuum is a recipe for guaranteed burnout / hating everything i make. And I don’t want Substack to become a place I feel beholden to.

So I’m taking it a day at a time, taking time to think about what i’m feeling before reacting, and being gentle with myself for not knowing the answers right away. (I will inevitably freak out - I’ve cried three times today!! - but I still think this is the correct hypothetical starting place, ha ha.)

desk reminder

I know deep down that having faith in your impulses and abilities is where the most impactful and meaningful art comes from. I’m grateful I have somewhere to put these things and are glad you’re along for the ride!

xo Zoe